Remember her?

Since it feels like I've been reliving so much of what transpired three years ago with my first pregnancy, I thought it only natural to spend some time looking at photos of the first few weeks of Elisa's life. What a shock it was to finally see her that August day. No matter how long 9 months feels sometimes, the first 48 hours with your own baby is nothing if not surreal. Calling yourself someone's mom is just weird at first, let alone holding and feeding a baby that you can't quite reconcile with the alien kicking machine you've been harboring all that time. Sonograms are amazing and yet, they can't fully prepare us for what this little being will look and act like. I remember seeing Elisa and just being in awe of her dark hair and her buggy little eyes and smushy nose. She wasn't a looker, by any means, but she was mine. And it was so exciting to finally see her and to know she was real.

And now again I find myself caught up in the daydreaming game of what will this baby be like? Will she come out looking anything like her sister and will we see as much physical change in her as we did with Elisa? And maybe it's just because I'm getting those first flutters and kicks again that I'm anxious to see where this will all lead. It's easy to forget I'm pregnant somedays with all the craziness of caring for Elisa and running this show on my own (case in point, tonight we're on night #3 without Nacho). But then there is the growing belly that reminds me I'm on my way. Half way already, in fact. With so much more to go. Sigh. And that's when I remind myself that it's good that I have another 4+ months before I get to meet this little girl. I have a lot more daydreaming to do.