If it's Monday...

This is the last of my Memory Mondays for a while. I think I'm too undisciplined to remember to post something every week on a particular topic. But it was fun to try. This photo was taken almost a year ago this week. I love that Elisa's shirt is stained with a stream of drool--a sure sign of teeth yet to come. We had a big debate about getting a live tree again since Nacho is never in favor, and I was wondering if it would be wise with a 16 month old wandering around. But in the end, I needed that tree to cheer me up and it did. It gave me a focus for the holidays and I was inspired to decorate and carry on despite having been laid off. Elisa was in awe of the tree and yet she didn't want to get too close. Her first encounters with it were almost a lesson in tactile overload--the prickly pine needles too much for her to deal with. But within a matter of days, she was racing over to it and fiddling with little ornaments here and there. I tried to keep the bigger (and more breakable) ones up top at least out of reach. And that worked well for the most part. In fact, I remember how normal the tree came to be after a week or so. Elisa didn't go crazy trying to topple it and I could relax again when she was momentarily out of sight, knowing that the tree was safe. So flash forward to this year and I am eager to get another tree and start decorating. Something in me refuses to do this until December officially begins, but it's fast approaching. And I think Elisa might be more fun helping get the ornaments out this time around, although the lights are still mine. Nothing like a little Christmas control freak to kick the season off right!

Staying warm...or just being lazy

This morning we sent Nacho out bright and early at 8 a.m. to rake leaves in our local park. The mandatory volunteer hours we've whittled down are almost finished, and this will put us close to done before the year's end. Hurray! So how did Elisa and I spend the morning? Nice and cozy inside while Papa raked and chased leaves around in the cold. However, we did get dressed to go and meet him after his 3 hour shift was over. That way Elisa spent about 20 minutes running around the park, jumping on the scooter she hasn't seen in weeks. It was a reminder that winter is almost upon us and the days are not only brutally short but cold too. I haven't done any real holiday shopping yet, and could care less about the deals and steals of the big box stores. But I thought it might be a good day to stroll the neighborhood and after stopping in at Petunia's on Skillman Ave. we found this little hat I just couldn't resist. Who cares if she looks a bit like Paul Simon circa 1973? It's cute. And she let me put it on her for all of 5 seconds before ripping it off. So I think we're onto something. Of course, when you're nice and toasty inside you don't need a hat, right?

Giving thanks (aka eating too much)

I did it. I survived my first real Thanksgiving meal. When I made a plan last month to return from my Kansas City/California trip before the big day, I thought it would be nice to have a little Turkey Day gathering at our place. My friend Dan was looking for a co-conspirator to make the big meal and so an idea was born. In years past, I've either chickened out (literally--making my sister's famous "Chicken Elegan") or joined the Killeen-Wessels in Astoria for a friendly potluck supper. But this year I felt up to the challenge of a turkey-basting marathon dinner. And perhaps with Elisa getting older, I am yearning for some traditions we can stick with. So on Tuesday, Dan and I met for a little planning session and on Wednesday the cooking began in earnest. By yesterday morning, the timeline was pretty well mapped out and at 5 p.m. we had dinner on the table. Not bad. Especially when I heard about my friend Carl's first turkey disaster--let's just say the fresh bird was finally cooked and ready at 3 a.m. Really? Who does that??

So this post doesn't have a cute family portrait to go with it, but then I was kind of busy. However, I did manage to capture the food and the lovely table we had thanks to Dan's flowers (and a few leftover pumpkins). Having new friends join us (my friend Karen and her son Paul, and cousins and the aunt of our late friend Patrick) was a good reminder that giving thanks can have so many meanings. It can be the thanks of having a nice meal to share on this day or the gratitude of health and family when faced with incredible tragedy. Last Thanksgiving we played and ate at Molly and Ronan's, knowing that Patrick was back in Missouri following his first bout of cancer treatment. I didn't think much of it at the time, except to wish him a speedy recovery. And this year, we mourn for what we've lost and remember Patrick's life only a month after his passing. It doesn't seem real and yet, we know it is. The truth is that every year I try to remember what I am thankful for and realize that nothing is guaranteed in this life. This holiday I think that's even more important.

We made it...

We made it back home late last night after an almost pleasant day traveling across the country. I really couldn't visualize how the day would progress, so I just stayed in the moment and things seemed to work out fine. Go figure. Of course, there was some planning and prep before rolling out of Stacey's, but without a phone (my "lifeline," if you will), I was kind of roughing it through the drive and airports. Elisa rolled with the punches and only really flamed out as we taxied on the second plane. I knew she was overdue for a nap, but the perky flight attendant who tried to "calm" her down was only making things worse. Within about 30 seconds of her pitch going up an octave, I asked the lady to just "give us a minute" and she smiled and backed away. Far away. Elisa was in a full out kicking, bucking and hysterical screaming fit. It probably only lasted 2 minutes, but those can feel like an eternity when you are taking off on an airplane and the entire cabin is groaning in silent disgust. I've become pretty immune to these moments, which is probably why I still consider yesterday such a success. Because guess what happened next? Yes, that's right....wait for it....Elisa passed the f*** out. Oh, sweet Jesus. It was divine. She slept for nearly 2 hours laying half across my lap and into the other seat. I had a free hand to turn the magazine I remembered to buy, and all was forgiven.

Doesn't she look like an angel? She was actually posing and working the bear for me. It was hilarious.

And the hair looks groomed, but really she had half a head band sliding off. Cute anyway.

And this is her shot. She had to hold the camera before I could put it away. We're doing a lot of that these days. So, yes, she can be an angel when she wants. And it doesn't hurt that she looks the part. So many people we passed in the airports greeted us both and made sweet gestures of smiles and waves to a little girl they will never see again. Life is funny like that. I sometimes wonder why we can be so much kinder to people we don't even know. Then I made it home and found out there was no milk in the house. At 11:30 p.m. And let's just say, I tried hard to remember that my husband wasn't punishing us for having a week of sunshine in CA without him. He was just busy working, and for that I am grateful. So I'll have to forgive him too and just be glad that we are finally home in our own beds, waiting to be reunited for Thanksgiving. Looking forward to a long, cozy weekend at home with friends and good food. And my little angel.

Memory Mondays

Now that the month is almost over, I'm hitting my stride with the Memory Mondays. Will this continue in December? Does any besides me care? I do admit to loving photos and taking way too many. That's a given. So when I look back at old photos of Elisa, it's so hard to choose just one. She has changed and morphed from that little black haired baby to a sunshine-y little toddler with way too much spunk for me most days. But as I'm winding up this trip to California, I'm seeing her do so many new things every day and it's all part of who she is now. Like seeing her thumping away with real drum sticks on her cousin Mia's drum kit, pretending to be Marina from the Fresh Beats. Yes, we've been sucked into that show too. Elisa was singing along to herself and having the best time and I could just sit back and watch. Who knew that her music class last year might lead to this? When I took this photo at Music for Aardvarks in Sunnyside, I was just glad Elisa wasn't chewing on the sticks. I decided to take that class last winter after getting laid off unexpectedly and wondering what in the world I might do with my time. And it was a great exploration of music for a then 17 month old. I could tell that she was getting more into it with each passing week. And now that we're in yet another music class (Kids Music Together) this fall, I really see how much more she participates and even sings the songs at home. That little brain has been soaking it all up and I love how and when she chooses to reveal that to me. So I forgive the drumming and tapping everything in the house. I think she might even get her own sticks this Christmas.

Joshua Tree

Some stories are worth repeating, especially in my mother's family. Like how my grandpa's family was run out of St. Mary's, Kansas in the middle of the night, or how grandma once spotted my grandpa in a newsreel during WWII, or the time my grandparents divorced and remarried. Yeah, they're a little bit nuts. But these stories have become legend and now I enjoy nothing more than passing them onto the new generation. So when my mother decided to come with me on this trip to Twentynine Palms, CA to visit my sister, I knew we would be hearing about the joshua trees. Oh, yes. The famed trees of her childhood that my photo-obsessed grandma would stop at and make everyone pose in front of to capture the yearly summertime treks out west. I'm sure I get my love of photography from her, so I won't get too judgmental. But clearly, my grandma was a bit overzealous with her passion for the joshua trees, and my mother hasn't forgotten it. We finally took a drive into the Joshua Tree National Park today and in good humor, we all had to pose with our first big tree. It wasn't in the scorching heat and it wasn't after days of driving from Kansas City, sleeping in the car along the way. So maybe we had that going for us. There were nothing but smiles all around. Yet, when I hear about how my grandmother would throw her kids in the car and drive by herself all the way there, I wonder where she got the nerve. It makes my little plane hops and day trips seem mundane by comparison. But either way, I guess when you want to get somewhere, you will find a way. I love that my grandmother made these treks with my mom because it made this trip out west with Elisa even more special.

Rockin' time

After a couple of days lounging around home, I was itching to get outside and see some more of this wild landscape. So yesterday we made a left turn out of the driveway and headed toward the hills behind the subdivision. Down a winding road we found the 49 Palms Canyon trail which starts from a nicely paved parking lot and takes you a mile and a half into the desert to a beautiful palm-laden oasis. Or so I'm told. Of course with a toddler, I knew I wouldn't be hiking anything serious. But I thought perhaps we might walk a little bit up the hill and take a few photos, and we kind of did. Elisa was not interested in following me up, nor staying on the path, so we opted to leave her with Grandma in the parking lot while I made a little climb. There were enough views out over the valley and of the local flora that I felt I'd accomplished my goal. But I was still a bit disappointed. Nacho and I used to love to hike around and made a wonderful 10 day trek to the Southwest in 2000 that I still dream about. We ventured all around, taking little hikes here and there with hardly any itinerary. It was a delightful way to explore and enjoy this starkly beautiful scenery. Flash forward to my life now, and the reality is that these kind of spontaneous hikes aren't really possible. There are little feet and naps to contend with, tantrums and safety concerns. It's okay, and it won't last forever, but sometimes, I just want to hike up and away and see where it will take me. Is that so wrong?

Getting the sillies out

Our time in California is whizzing by and we've been enjoying every minute. Elisa has been waking up around 6:45 a.m. (9:45 a.m. New York time!) and staying up til about 8 p.m. at night. The schedule just kind of worked itself out and I'm extremely relieved we're not having 4 a.m. wakeups out here. That would just be cruel. With Stace and Mark off to work and the kids at school, the days are pretty lowkey, but I think today I'll venture into town or drive to nearby Joshua Tree National Park. The desert landscape is so wild and harsh in its beauty. I really like the contrast to the lushness of New England. Of course, I'm not sure I would want to live here, but the visit it enough to make me appreciate both climates. After all those gorgeous leaves in the chilly Midwest air, it's nice to bask in the abundant sunshine and warmth of the desert. We hit up a nearby park after Mia got out of school yesterday and Elisa was squealing with delight. I think the weekend will be a tour of the area and the farmer's market and local eateries, and maybe a visit from mom's friend Karen who lives in Las Vegas. So for now we're resting up and just enjoying the change of pace from city living. If I could move this state just a few thousand miles closer to New York, I think we'd be visiting once a month. Now there's an idea.

High and dry

It must be the California air, but this morning after waking at 6:30 a.m. (not bad considering it was a very quiet night), I was already breathing better. The head cold that plagued me all week long in Kansas City was making its exit and the desert air was cool and lovely. Having a wonderful niece keep Elisa busy all day long also didn't hurt. I had much more time to relax and hang out today and that's pretty much all we did. It was a very pjs kind of day which everyone needs once and a while--especially when traveling. The most we did was wander around the backyard for a bit and pick some limes off the tree. Stace and Mark have really lucked out with the house they are renting for the remainder of their Marine Corps duty. It's a beautiful Spanish-style ranch with tiled floors, granite everywhere and lots of wide open spaces. And the yard is a serene retreat full of fruit trees and desert flora. Elisa is talking up a storm and entertaining all of us with her dances, wild gestures and love of all things Nickelodeon. Even for me it's been fun and kind of eye-opening to see how well other people can understand her these days. She is actually making more complex statements and really trying to imitate and change her speech to be better understood. It's progressing every day, and definitely from one week to another I can see the difference. So I'm glad we're here now to catch up and enjoy this new home with her cousins. It's incredibly different from our little hops down to North Carolina the past few years, but something tells me we're going to be making this trek a lot over the next two years. Let's hope Papa can join us the next time. We miss you.

Memory Mondays Revisited

I suppose it's only fitting that after months of down time with no ideas, I picked a very busy month to start a blogging theme. My idea to revisit an old pic every Monday in November has come to a screeching halt (after only one week). But in fairness, I was traveling last week (to Kansas City) and this week (to California), so things have been a bit of a blur. We made it into Twentynine Palms, CA last night after a relatively painless trek which included two flights (connecting in Phoenix) and an hour's worth of driving from Palm Springs. Elisa impressed me by actually falling asleep on the second flight and staying down through all the shuffling around. It made the very long day much more manageable. So back to the topic at hand, we are so happy to celebrate an early Thanksgiving here with Stace and the family. Looking back at Elisa in November 2008, I am amazed by how small and almost unrecognizable she was...

The euphoria of having a newborn was giving way to the sheer exhaustion of caring for a baby and I remember such a mix of feelings when I looked at her. I loved her like no other and yet, I wanted her to be different. I wanted her to sleep. I wanted her to not cry so much. I wanted her to eat without screaming in pain afterwards. We were at our wit's end with the colic and craziness of the third month and there was no end in sight. Our best nights were getting 4 or 5 hours worth of sleep around 5 a.m. Not exactly what I was hoping for, yet I had no idea how to change it. My life was upside down and inside out. I was a zombie and I just wanted to do something familiar--eat a hot meal, sleep in, or just go out for a nice evening. But it wasn't to be. How had no one told me about this, I wondered? How did I get so tricked by this beautiful little girl? It felt like such a roller coaster. I would cry tears of love and amazement feeding her quietly at 4 a.m., yet she could make me rage after an hour of non-stop fussing. Why wouldn't she sleep? I wanted to hear that 4 months was the magic mark. That she would just figure out everything I wanted her to do and wake up a new baby. And over the course of the next few weeks, she really did begin to change. We stopped breastfeeding around this time and after about 5 days of Nutramigen, she was a different baby. She was sleeping in long stretches without the wild screaming and tummy pains, and within a month, she was a much more predictable baby. My life was livable again. I felt giddy about seeing her wake up in the morning. What a difference sleep made! There was so much to be thankful for.

Kansas City Girl

This week in Kansas City marks the fourth time Elisa has visited in her two years. We are lucky to still have family in town and that makes visiting all the more special. So after a couple of nights with friends, we picked my mom up at the airport and swung out to Independence to visit with my Grandma Mitchell. On December 6th, Grandma will turn 90 and what a life it's been. She now shares a room at the assisted living center with a woman she grew up with. In fact, as Grandma likes to tell it, she was at her friend's house the day she was born. She was hiding out under their porch with the big brother of the family, eating peaches and having a good time. Isn't it a small world? As we visited with her the other day, she was delighted to see Elisa jumping and dancing. She thought she was "something else." And we couldn't agree more. Yesterday we made it out to Arthur Bryant's for some barbecue and Nacho was relieved to check that off his to-do list. Burnt ends and white bread for me, while Nacho enjoyed the combo platter, fries and coleslaw. Mmmm. Elisa was asleep in the car just moments before we pulled in, but she immediately perked up when she got inside and saw the food. "My sandwich" she said and away she went eating like a real Kansas City girl. That's my kid.

Midwestern hues

We made it to Kansas City on Tuesday afternoon and what a fall welcome we got. The leaves are still clinging on here with an amazing range of colors. It's really beautiful. We've been staying with our friends Jill and Dave in their home in the Waldo area of the city and the streets are so picturesque with the bursts of color. Of course, we're not staying around to rake the leaves up, so we can tell them how pretty it is with none of the hassle! Our first night here we managed to get Nacho some barbecue at Oklahoma Joe's which was really tasty--and yes, in a gas station. I had heard this comment many times, but only when we were pulling into the parking lot did I fully comprehend that it's not a converted gas station-cum-restaurant but an actual, functioning gas station. Riiiiight. So, anyway, it was good food and we had a great time catching up with Jill and Dave. Yesterday we woke up, grabbed breakfast at First Watch in Fairway, KS and then hit the Nelson-Atkins art museum on the plaza. Since it's free, we hit the highlights and managed to run around the grounds for a bit before Elisa tired out.

Since we didn't have big plans for the afternoon, we opted to come back to the house and let Elisa take a decent nap. And she did. We all got some afternoon shut eye which made dinner at Blanc on the plaza all that much more enjoyable. Elisa ate like a champ and we had wonderful burgers with some inspired beer choices. My kind of night. Coming back to watch a little Yo Gabba Gabba before bedtime was the perfect night cap. Elisa did really well all day yesterday, but for the first time I think we made it through a walk, dinner, bedtime without a single tantrum. It was effortless and I could see how much fun she was having with all the attention. With Jill and Dave expecting their first (a boy!) in January, the talk was frequently about the ups and downs of parenting. It's hard to offer anything resembling advice when you know it's territory best chartered independently, but I really think they'll be great parents. They have done their homework, have a great home to welcome the baby and are lucky to have family nearby. I'm so excited for them. And while I completely admit I'm a Kansas City novice at times having left here at 18, I have been rediscovering the city on this trip and it's been a lot of fun.

Sing-a-long

In the past several weeks, we've been taking advantage of a playgroup on Monday mornings that's offered at a local church. It's a kind of pay-as-you-go, free form playtime that works well for us since we often don't know from one week to another what we'll be doing. I remember taking Elisa there for the first time last winter as she was just getting better at walking. It was kind of a nightmare for unstable kids with all the older ones buzzing about in plastic cars, and the noise level was just too much for me to bear after an hour. Fast forward a year, and I have no such complaints. Elisa is now the one buzzing around pushing a doll in a shopping cart and the squeals are often hers. Funny how perspective is everything. But what I like most about watching Elisa play there is the chance to see how she does with other kids during snack time and the end of session sing-a-long. I love seeing all the little faces lined up at the tables, munching quietly and asking for more juice. And just in the past few sessions, she has gotten much more interested in the ABCs and songs sung at the end. So we've been singing them a lot now at home, and let me tell you that I had no idea how much fun a girl could have with Wheels on the Bus, or the Itsy Bitsy Spider. When I put her down for a nap or at bedtime, Elisa begs for these songs, complete with hand motions. I can hardly resist. And so yesterday as she started singing Itsy Bitsy Spider on her own, I had to snap a few pics. She's a quite the songstress.

Playing nice

Yesterday we had Juliet over for a play date in the afternoon while her mom had to run to a meeting in the city. It's nice to know the kids well enough at this point that we can do things like this without making them feel like abductees. So here are Elisa and Juliet (aka "Jet" in Elisa's vernacular) having a bit too much fun jumping and laying around.

They both totally love playing pretend sleep. Here they are almost quieting down before erupting in giggles.

Of course they can't be still for too long...must jump some more. Although I think Elisa wanted to bounce more than Juliet. There was a bit of a debate going on and Juliet finally told her she was done jumping. Elisa wasn't thrilled, but she wanted her friend to stay in the crib.

So there was some impromptu hugging to make sure Juliet knew she was wanted...so cute.

And then, like that, it was nap time for BOTH of them. Elisa went straight to the crib without passing go--she had a minor meltdown and it was just time. So I took Juliet to the makeshift bed on the couch where she snuggled in with hardly a whimper. She didn't last as long sleeping, but she was so quiet and calm just reading and hanging out. I even had time to sit and eat my lunch in peace. And I thought I'd be in for a crazy afternoon, but really, with these two to entertain themselves, my work was done. Nice.