Flyin' high

Elisa is a daddy's girl if ever there was one. She might tolerate me for days on end, but when Papa arrives home, it's easy to see her eyes light up. He is all fun and usually has a new trick up his sleeve. As much as I hate seeing kids (especially small babies) get thrown in the air, I have to admit there is something thrilling about that catch and release. Here is Elisa in all her airborne glory...

So maybe it was Nacho's departure yesterday that knocked the wind out of Elisa's sails. She seemed fine most of the day and then at bedtime, she would not settle down. Every 10 minutes I had to go back in her room and rock her. For over 2 hours. Not feeling too hot myself, it wasn't exactly the kind of low key evening I had in mind. I could only guess that she might be having some congestion issues (she was pretty stuffy) or maybe her teeth are finally close to poking through (I spot some molar bumps on the way). Whatever it was, she was not a happy girl last night and with only one of us to console her, it was a long night. This morning, she awoke with another low-grade fever and we spent much of the day playing quietly, reading and just trying to keep things restful. For both of us. But now tonight, Papa is home again and the playfulness returned. She even let him rock her at bedtime, which means she must have missed him last night too.

Lookin' good

This afternoon we went out for brunch to our favorite local Mexican place, De Mole, along with our good friends Dan and Dessi. Back in the day, we all worked together and had a fabulous time sharing meals and generally commiserating about work and life. These days, the three of us get together all too rarely so this was a special treat. The fact that Dessi is moving out of state tomorrow made it especially bittersweet. She is expecting her first child (also a girl!) this summer and we had so many things to catch up on and chat about. It takes me back to the feeling I had two years ago--so much anticipation and all the joy of the unknown. Staring at the sonograms for a glimpse of what your baby will look like, the newness of the first kicks, the waking at all hours of the night and being unable to sleep. Ah, yes, it feels like it was only yesterday. It doesn't feel real to be sitting there talking about my 18 month old. How did I get here? And more importantly, am I any wiser? What can I tell a soon-to-be mom?

Elisa waiting for the guacamole to arrive.
Dan and Dessi striking a pose (and me in the upper left corner snapping away)
Cool kid and cool Dan (below).

Maybe it's the cynic in me, but there is something about new parenthood that defies any introduction. I don't think any two people experience it the same and to taint it with your own discoveries is almost impolite. Yet, I want to be helpful. I want to remember to tell her the things that I wish I had known--to be kinder to myself, to believe that I would sleep again, to kiss your husband and remember that he's the one that got you into this mess, to not stress about where or how the baby sleeps in the first few months. There were no long-term patterns established by a night or two in the swing or bouncy chair. The goal was to survive. Just survive (and forget doing it gracefully, as my mother said). And try not to worry when you feel like you've made a terrible mistake and had a perfectly good life before this unpredictable, demanding baby ruined it all. Oh yes, I remember those days (and nights). It all felt like it would last forever and I would never know how to cope. But amazingly, I'm still here and life really did get better. Every six months, it felt like there was another epiphany of parenthood and it just got easier. And now, a year and a half into this experiment, we are so glad to be looking ahead towards all the milestones of toddlerdom. New language, more engagement in activities, new places to see and seasons to unfold (hurry up, spring!). I know Dessi will find her own way to this spot and beyond, and I hope to see her again soon to hear all about it.

Just another Wednesday

These two are trouble...

You know Elisa is feeling better when she is back to running around the apartment like a mad woman and wants to have a friend over for lunch. Okay, it was really my idea, but she didn't seem to mind that Kristin and her daughter Juliet were going to drop by for a bite of chili and some afternoon fun. These two girls have been fast friends since Kristin and I were both heavily pregnant and shared a cab back from the city after meeting in our newborn care class at Real Birth. Yes, in utero friends. Is that possible? Well, they didn't exactly have a choice, but seeing them conspire and play together at 18 months is a sure sign that they are onboard with our playdate scheduling and impromptu visits.

Here they are last week after music class hanging out at Juliet's coloring in the living room. Elisa was intrigued by the crayons and we have since purchased her a set of her own. I'm not near the artist that Kristin is, but the rough drawings and her "filling in the shapes" has provided quite a bit of amusement so far.

Juliet also likes to get her groove on and was showing Elisa how to rock out on the guitar. It even plays The Police. I was impressed. This girl knows her 80s rock classics.

But today our playdate turned a bit more dramatic than usual. While Kristin and I chatted away in Elisa's room and Nacho and Patrick had the kitchen covered, our girls set to wandering about. Nothing unusual there. Normally, they can't go too far in this apartment before they are running back to us, and we'd been playing for an hour or so without any tantrums or problems. Of course, that should have been a sign they were collaborating a little too well. First, I heard Kristin walk to the living room and shout back, "Uh, where are the girls?" I was almost to the bathroom and I flung the door open wide thinking they were in there. No luck. Then I heard her say "Ohhhh, they're OUTSIDE!" Incredulous, I dashed to the front door of the apartment and beyond and saw Juliet 20 feet down the hall, and Elisa making a mad dash--arms flailing and giggling all the way--back towards me. Barefoot. Of course, the first thing that came to mind was how the heck the door was open but this we figured out since we had just welcomed Patrick into the apartment and the door hadn't shut fully. But then to think that these two girls approached the door, saw they were this close to freedom and then made a break for it is just, well, it's kind of scary but mostly hilarious.

Nacho and I both thought it was a good thing that they didn't head straight to the stairwell out our front door. Instead, they ran towards the elevators and were apparently chasing a ball most of the way. The fact that four adults failed to catch this maneuver is pretty shameful. But now we know better than to let these two out of our sight. It can only get worse, right? ;)

On the mend...

I'm happy to report that Elisa is doing much, much better after a good night's rest. She actually went down around 8:30 p.m. and we didn't hear a peep out of her until almost 7 a.m. A better night than when she's well! After seeing how hyper and slap happy the prednisone made her yesterday, I was beginning to think this was a trade off for hearing her cough improve. She didn't go down for either nap without a fight and she struggled most of the day to keep from falling over or crying at the least little thing. But by bedtime, she was just too tired to fight, I suppose. Luckily, this morning we finished the last dose and now she is resting again. Time to clean up and enjoy the rest of the day.

Everyday Snapshots

Today marks the one week anniversary of a new blog I'm working on called Everyday Snapshots. This is the brainchild of my good friend Maggie who had seen a similar blog and wanted to start something like that between us. Basically, we each post one photo a day and tell the time it was taken. For 365 days. A simple concept and one that appealed to the photographer in me.

At first, I wasn't sure how this would work logistically or even if we would find enough subject matter. But surprisingly, it has helped connect us and our different, if similar stay-at-home lives, by way of the little things that we see and do. Maybe that's the lesson in shifting gears and devoting your daily grind to parenting: that we see all kinds of moments that are normally rushed through and if we're lucky enough, we realize that and savor them. Not all the time. But sometimes. Maybe even most of the time. It's made me think more about how we divide up the day and how just the smallest change can make one day so completely different from the next.

While we haven't coordinated our subject matter, it has almost psychically melded this first week on the blog. I get to see Maggie's photo before I post mine, but still, it's funny how I seem to be the yin to her yang. We are each curious enough about the dynamic to make this effort and so far, it's been a cool surprise to see what each day brings. So, please check out our new endeavor and we'll keep on posting. Just for you.

Croup-tastic

As the saying goes, there's a first time for everything, and last night was our first time heading to the ER at 1 a.m. with a sick kid. Elisa had been a bit sniffly and nursing a wee cough for a day or so, but the low-grade fever came on just after nap time yesterday. With a dose of Motrin, she seemed good to go and we enjoyed an evening with friends during which she played and ate normally. We got home a couple of hours past her usual bed time, but she went down just fine and that was it. My head hit the pillow around 11:30 p.m. and I was ready for bed. By 12:30 a.m., however, Elisa had woken up a couple of times and was now burning up. Her temp was just over 102 F and I wasn't liking the wheezing sound coming in between her cries. It didn't immediately hit me that this was something more than a cold, but I tried to think through my options. I started running a hot shower and Elisa folded up into me and slept as I rocked her back and forth in the steam. Returning to her room, she couldn't stay down and I knew this night was just beginning.

I called the pediatrician on-duty and she was extremely helpful and willing to listen via phone to Elisa's increasingly noisy congestion. Then came the verdict: croup. And a decision was made to get her to a pediatric ER in the city. When things like this happen, I sometimes feel like my mind is a few steps behind my emotions as I try to gauge the situation and imagine all the possible scenarios playing out. Kind of like heading off to the hospital in labor, I was racked with the idea that maybe if we just stayed put for a bit longer, this would turn out better. Maybe we could do without all that noise and light and craziness in the wee small hours of the morning. But another part of me--let's call it the mothering instinct--knew that I was not okay staying home. Elisa was laboring to breathe and when she cried or got choked up, it produced in me the kind of stomach turning anxiety that told me I had to get her checked out just to relieve my mind. And so we were off.

Without a doubt, having a sick kid changes everything. It brings out all the insecurities of parenting and makes your heart ache with sympathy for their tiny fevered brow. It makes you want to beat the stupid doctor who after hearing Elisa cry and bark and whimper for 5 minutes, declared, "Well, she sounds good." Good? Are you high? When I asked for clarification, she offered that it was in fact croup, but that there was no stridor. Oh, right. Okay, well, silly me, let me get out of your hair. Wait, what? What the hell is stridor? So when I asked about the barking and that noise--that kind of gasping, rattly, not-breathing-at-the-moment sound--the doctor said that this wasn't it. So, keep up the steam baths and (my personal fave) take her around the block in the cold night air. Yeah, okay, I thought, why didn't I think of that myself? Luckily, our pediatrician didn't like this answer either and offered to meet me in the morning at the office. We returned home with a sleeping girl in tow and were relieved when she stayed down from 3:30 a.m. until 5 a.m. With just a little more prodding, she slept through until 9:30 a.m. with scattered fits of crying and coughing. But it wasn't enough to wake her completely, so we got a much better night than either Nacho or I expected.

Today after our appointment, we started her on a three-day course of oral steroids and the difference this evening is palpable. Her cries are still sweetly pathetic, but she isn't wheezing with every sob and cough. You never know how the night will go, but I am guessing that it can't be much worse than a 3-hour detour through the ER shuffle. At least here we know what a bedside manner is.

Musica!

Since the beginning of January, we've been taking a once a week music class (Music for Aardvarks) here in the neighborhood. It's a kind of sing-a-long, dance-a-long jamboree for the kids and a bit of an exercise class (stretching, running, lifting) for moms and dads. In the last two weeks or so, Elisa has been participating a bit more and seems to follow along better with each session. Just like everything else, it's hard to see this progress until you find yourself documenting it, and oh yeah, she's really running around and playing the instruments. So here she is in all her glory...egg shakers in hand, enjoying the last chords and then some.

(NOTE: this video from our new camera looks black at first, but click and it does in fact play).

Snowmageddon!

Here we are again with snow a week later and I just couldn't resist. I had to get Elisa out in it today since her toddler snow pants are sitting in a drawer unused. So we trekked a couple of blocks on foot to the local park and she was really quiet as the snowflakes hit her cheeks and eyelashes. There wasn't too much wind so the wet snow made a nice slow shower for us to play in. For a little while, at least.

She didn't know quite what to make of the other kids and their snowballs, but since this is her first real winter outing, I'll give her a pass. I think more than anything, she enjoyed looking up at the trees and the skies to see where the heck this white stuff was coming from. Hopefully next year she will be up for rolling around and aiming a few zingers at me. Growing up with a nice slope in our backyard and a neighborhood where we sledded in the street, I feel like city kids can miss some of the best opportunities to ride around in the snow. Sure, Central Park is probably lovely today, but it's not exactly out our back door. But when we do make it there with our tobbogan in tow, I will remember to bring the hot cocoa if she promises to wear her mittens.

Turning it on

For Valentine's Day this year, my mom treated us to a wonderful lunch at a neighborhood spot (TJ's for those in the know) that we'd introduced her to last summer. It's the kind of place where Elisa is fawned over, the food is delicious and the check is ridiculously low. My kind of place. Considering we don't normally make V-Day a big deal, this was a fun distraction from the fact that Nacho was working and I would have been home alone watching my third episode of Yo Gabba Gabba for the day if she hadn't been here to take us out and treat us to a special meal.

The nice thing about mom's visits are that she never needs to be entertained here. Just being with us in the neighborhood, checking out the local shops and meeting our neighbors is enough for her and I don't feel the pressure of planning days with trips here and there and dining out every night. It's like the un-visit. Usually, we have a few favorite dishes (her meatloaf or enchiladas) and a few take-outs (Pio Pio or Butcher Block fish-n-chips) and the rest is relaxed and improvised. We catch up with Dan "the Man" Riley and try to sneak in some naps where we can. It's a chill week with an extra set of hands on deck. This week I felt a little cooped up because of the weather, but all in all, it was a benefit to have someone else to share Elisa with when the days can seem to drag on.

And if there is anything that Elisa likes more than an extra audience member, I haven't found it. She spent most of her time with Grandma jumping around the apartment (catching some air, mind you) and showing her the plethora of toys and stuffed animals that she can manipulate to great amusement (mostly her own). We had to laugh time and again at her "fake cry" which prompts much squinting and pretend crying--seriously, this girl is already playing that game--and the fact that she did not want to leave my side when it was time for a nap or bedtime. Despite the many hugs and kisses bestowed on Grandma this week, Elisa wasn't having her for rocking time. She wanted me and only me to put her to bed. I guess it's part of her setting boundaries and making choices which we kind of laugh at, but for her, showing preference is one of the signs that she is her own being. Oh, and don't we know that! So last night when she obliged and let Grandma rock her to sleep, without even a whimper, I knew something was up. Let's just say the girl knows how to turn on the charm when she wants to. And since it was Grandma's last night with us, I'd say she did it just in time.

Happy Valentines

Brrrrrrrr...

Following the snow we received mid-week, the city has gone into the deep freeze. I guess it is February after all, so I don't know what I expected. But the cabin fever that's settled in has been moderately relieved by our visit from Grandma this week. My mom flew up on Sunday and has plans to fly back Monday if the weather cooperates (we heard they got 6 inches of snow today in North Carolina!). She got to co-host playgroup at our place on Monday, participate in Elisa's music class on Thursday morning and she watched Elisa solo last night while Nacho and I enjoyed an early Valentine's evening out.

Which leads me to the fact that we went to see Avatar for our date night. Walking over the 39th Street bridge to the theater at Kaufmann Studios in Astoria was fun, if cold, and we were there in 10 minutes flat. A good reminder that when you live in the city and you are running late, if you hoof it, you'll probably wind up on time. I love that about this place. I really thought we couldn't have driven and parked any faster.

Afterwards, we were on our way to a favorite Greek restaurant when we spotted a little gem of a steakhouse (called Lucas) mixed in with the residential street. Since we weren't having any luck hailing a cab, and we were up for trying something new, we doubled back and found a perfect table waiting for us there. I think I'd forgotten what it was like to sit and talk and leisurely enjoy a meal. Something about being able to savor every bite and knowing there was no babysitter to rush home to was extremely relaxing. I guess I needed this. When we returned home, mom relayed the details of her evening with Elisa and the comic turns of a girl who has a thing for jumping, and dancing and getting the bedtime routine just so. It sounds like with no one else around, Elisa buttered up to Grandma and was all about the kisses and hugs which had eluded her earlier in the week while I was there. She even stayed down ALL night long and slept til 7:15 a.m.! Whatever she put in the bottle last night was liquid gold.

And bringing the Avatar glasses home was a fun way to share our evening out with Elisa. Here she is hamming it up. Quite the little nerd--a cute nerd, but still.

*SNOW DAY!*

Three little monkeys...

After a few weeks absence, we hosted our playgroup this afternoon and enjoyed seeing all our favorite faces. Finding a time that works well for the meetup when you have a bunch of kids with crazy nap schedules can be pretty hard. But today we opted for a 4p.m. go time and that seemed to work well. Just late enough that everyone had napped, and early enough that we had a little time before bed to relax and wind down. Ahhhhh.

Here are three of the little monkeys having a VERY good time in Elisa's bed.

Back to normal

Between Elisa's feverish week before our trip, the trip itself and jet lag adjustments, it's been quite an end to January and beginning to February. Part of the puzzle has also been hitting the 18 month mark and wondering how much these night wakings and burst of nonsensical language are showing us developmental progress and how much is just a glitch in the routine. In all fairness, Elisa travels extraordinarily well. She acclimated to a new room and crib and the hubbub of a big family without throwing us for a complete loop. But getting home and back to our normal routine has been a little more challenging than I expected. Maybe because I've been feeling a bit tired and under the weather, waking up early with her has been harder than usual and more confusing because at times she seems like she wants to keep sleeping and yet she won't go back to sleep. So, we oblige and get up, turn on the tea kettle and brace for another early morning. Today I even let Nacho sleep in (he did have to work afterall) and enjoyed my quiet time with her as we snuggled on the couch and watched Blues Clues. Nothing like a little bit of Steve in the morning when you can't see straight.Here she is after the first nap, playing around in her room with Papa and I. I love this grin and the way her face lights up when she's amused. Poking around her storage unit is a favorite past time and one that never fails to make her laugh. Oh, no...where is Elisa???
Whether she's chasing a ball around or swinging her guitar, Elisa finds a way to pause only briefly to investigate. She hasn't taken to some of her Christmas toys quite the way I'd imagined, but in time I think she will find the small pieces and characters useful to her story lines and daydreaming. I can see she wants to sit and play but sometimes she just can't stand stopping for that long.
Her baby doll has become a good way to interpret what she understands. I've been repeating the "baby is tired, the baby wants to go night-night" a lot and she has taken to rocking the baby to sleep. It's pretty funny because she swings the baby so violently that it's not possible to watch without laughing. And we're finding that more and more, Elisa understands commands in both English and Spanish with amazing clarity. She isn't talking much beyond the babble that spews forth from her with a lot of arm waving and hand gesturing, but boy can she jump when you ask her to!

Sights and Sounds

We're baaaack...Just like that, we returned to New York City yesterday after a mostly tolerable (though still unbearably long) flight. I think it's always hard to judge how a flight is going to go with a toddler or how to rate it even when you are almost home. If I had to summarize, the flights this go around were about a 7/10. Not entirely crappy and yet, not easy or pleasant either. Elisa napped twice on the way back for a total of 2 hours which left 6 hours of sitting and amusing her. Oy. But we survived and she has some more wonderful memories of Spain--er, wait. No, she won't even remember this. Which is why we had to take LOTS of pictures of her with her cousins and aunts and uncles and abuela. That way, when she is older she can look back and realize that even then, she was entertaining them all with her smiles and her besos and her sociable little self. She really did a great job of adjusting to all the people and the bustle and the food and the jostling around town. Here are just a few pics of our time there...