Just before the holidays I saw a Groupon for a discounted entry to the NY Hall of Science in Queens that included the Gingerbread Lane exhibit which is billed as the world's largest gingerbread village. I mean, how have we not seen that yet, I wanted to know?! So once things calmed down after Christmas and my sister's visit, Nacho's birthday and New Year's, I figured we'd check it out. The holiday break from school always promises to go on forever but after about a week, you realize you don't have that much time left. So by the 2nd of January when I was feeling like shit and trying to figure out what was going on with my stomach, it was the plan we had to cancel. Luckily though I found the strength to get up the day after my marathon ER visit and make good on my promise to take the girls to the museum. It sounded like a fairly low-key thing to do and we really didn't have anything better to do the day before school started back up. Seeing the amazing candy-covered decorations all around the upper atrium was fun, but the girls definitely weren't ooing and awing the way I was. They seemed much more interested in the science this time around and good thing we brought Papa along so he could delve right into making shadow puppets and airplanes and dropping their creations from the balcony to hit the target below. Yes, it was a museum visit with all kinds of lessons to be had and I enjoyed capturing it all with my new lens. I think it helped take my mind off my abdominal pain and the girls did their best to ham it up which made me smile.
My only real disappointment that day was that one of the newest exhibits "Connected Worlds" was temporarily out of order due to technical issues. I've seen a few photos from friends' visits and it really looks amazing. It will definitely mean a return trip in a few more months and, probably a return lunch or dinner at Nixtamal, where we ended our adventure that Sunday afternoon. More and more I realize these little girls aren't so little anymore. But I think it really hit me looking back at these photos. The one of Elisa and Nacho with his shadow puppet about to attack her and that look--that perfectly seven year old eye roll. OMG. It's too much. She's too much. I don't know when she grew up, but it's right there staring back at me now. And Carolina isn't far behind. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised, but sometimes it really seems like it happens in these leaps and bounds. We've been having a tough time of it again Elisa and I and I wish I could understand why that happens. Sometimes I want to squeeze her so tight and tell her that her emotion and rage is all going to carry her far in life if she can figure out where to focus it. But right now, it's exhausting. I just can't take it always directed at me, at us. I know she does better at school holding herself together, but sometimes I just wish we could go one day without her screaming or lashing out. When she was at the museum and engaged it seems to give us a respite. And that is worth a lot. I hope for more love and hugs and engagement this year. And way less of the other stuff. Is there a Groupon for that too?
