Candles and cupcakes

With the beginning of May, our summer season of outdoor grilling and umpteen birthday parties has officially started.  And since there are even more kids in the mix nowadays, we are celebrating the second birthdays of Kira and Jasper, followed soon by Coraline, Carolina, and Crosby (what alliteration!), as well as the first birthdays of Grace, Lucy, and Noah and the birth of little Xavier just over a week ago.  Whew! This playgroup has really exploded in only a few short years. Yes, there's a lot going on these days and kids in various states of crawling, walking and running everywhere you look.  At the park, there's definitely a feeling of community that allows us each a small break from the daily grind of child minding. I've gotten more comfortable with letting Carolina wander a bit on her own now since most people know who she belongs to and can point her back my direction if need be. And there's rarely a need.  Watching her tackle the big slide on her own or slowly inch the scooter around the track is such a major change from all the dependence of the baby stages.  I can sometimes feel the weight of that neediness lifting off of me ever so slightly,  and it's wonderful. It gives me hope for a future where my children love me, but don't need me in such a constant fashion. We're still in the thick of it now with two kids under 5, but there are some nights when we hang out at the park all doing our own thing and it feels like this is really living again. This isn't so bad.

Appreciation

Before another weekend rolls by, I should really recap how nice my Mother's Day was. Nacho was off both Saturday and Sunday so that alone made me happy. Sometimes when his days off are one at a time and scattered throughout the week, it's anxiety-producing because I feel like we're not using them wisely--too much time spent running errands or laundry. So having two in a row felt like we had all the time in the world to hang out and just do a few fun things along with the usual park runs.  Of course, I like to think of myself as a low maintenance woman so when Mother's Day rolls around, Nacho  knows better than to worry about buying me anything elaborate. In years past, he has indulged me in a spa gift certificate, but that was probably because he was making up for the year I was pregnant with Elisa when he said I wasn't really a mother yet. Okay, in hindsight, he was probably right, but somehow being 7 moths pregnant at the time I felt I was entitled to some celebration for getting the fetus that far.  Flash forward 5 years and I was rewarded with homemade cards, a bracelet and paper flowers from Elisa who absolutely beamed with pride. She was so excited to give these gifts to me and I was truly, deeply appreciative. It's times like that when I really look at her and see how far she's come and realize we're only still beginning to know each other. How cool is that? 

The rest of the morning was spent at T-ball at SGP which went marginally better than the first week, then a donut run to Peter Pan Bakery in Greenpoint, BK where we scored some major glazed goodness. After a couple of failed runs there lately, this felt like a real coup. Of course we didn't get there until almost 12:30 p.m. which had something to do with it. I mean, who's ever heard of a donut shop having more donuts later in the day?   They're nuts--or catering to hipsters. Hard to tell.  Anyway, I returned to flowers secretly bought and stashed on the dining room table and a nice, quiet evening at home with the girls and an easy dinner while they slept. The sweet snuggles at bedtime were probably the highlight of an otherwise enjoyable day and another reminder that being a mom is mostly about the things money can't buy. It's what makes me happy I'm here every day right now.  Mother's Day was just an excuse to rest in between the diaper changes and multiple requests for food and toys and entertainment. Some day it will mean breakfast in bed prepared by my girls after a nice morning sleeping in. Some day...

Happy Mother's Day!

Carolina and Elisa, I love you very, very, very much. Thanks for making me a mom.
XOXO, Mom

Friday night barbecues

The Friday night barbecues with the playgroup have begun again at SGP and I couldn't be happier. There is something about throwing together a bag full of picnic food and  random cutlery and hoping for the best that just makes me feel good. It's living an improvised life--something I strive to do more of--and sharing it with people you enjoy.  And every weekend there's a slightly different mix of who goes and what food shows up which always keeps it lively. This week I brought some hot dogs, pasta salad and a chocolate-pistachio bundt cake that won rave reviews. Kristin's mom said it had the texture and glaze of a donut which is high praise indeed. I think I'll be making it again before summer's end. Nacho was busy flying so he missed out, but the girls were fine on their own for a bit, so I managed to have a nice evening relaxing around the picnic tables.

The rain that fell on us all week long managed to make some nice puddles around the field and track. I tried not to care too much if the girls got wet, but asked Elisa to keep herself and her sister out of the mud slide that had engulfed the ball field. A few other kids didn't heed this call to stay clean and as I ventured closer to get a photo, I managed to incur the wrath of one such mud slinger. Oh well, lesson learned! The evening wound down with a pretty calm vibe. I had the girls home, cleaned up and in bed by about 9 p.m. which wasn't too bad considering I was on my own.  They both even slept in until 7:30 a.m. the next morning which almost never happens. It was a nice payback for having such fun the night before.  I know I drone on and on sometimes about the benefits of our neighborhood, our local park and our playgroup, but it really makes our lives so much richer. A lot of times I wonder about the suburbs and if there are places like this elsewhere but with bigger, cheaper homes (that we might be able to afford to own!). Prices for one-family homes in the Gardens are topping $670K recently which just makes me sad. How in the hell are middle class families supposed to stay here beyond renting? It's just boggles my mind. Our comfortable two bedroom rental is all we really need, but still sometimes, I dream of having that yard and wonder where I would have to move to afford it.  But then I realize I would have to start all over finding families and friends we enjoy as much as these. I keep coming back to the thought that this little bubble in which we find ourselves living is too perfect to mess with.  Nights like these remind me that we might not have our own backyard, but we have a communal play space that is far more important--for us as well as them.  So for now, the only grilling we'll be doing will be at the park during the Friday night barbecues. And that's just fine by me.  

May momentum

It's around this time of year that everything outside starts to look alive again. The trees begin to green  up, and the flowers we pass every day on the way to the park command us to stop and appreciate their beauty. I swear the trip takes 5 minutes longer because we are oggling the blooms.  But that's okay. If being able to stay at home has taught me anything, it's that I am surrounded by a world of color and beauty that I dearly missed when I was rushing to and fro each day.  I'm glad I can take a few extra minutes and show my girls what they are living through: another spring full of new life.  Isn't this what we waited for all winter?  Well, now it's here so I need to slow down and drink it in.  I may be rushed to get to pick up on time or want to sprint to the park some afternoons, but I'm never really late for anything. So there's lots of time to enjoy things like the cherry blossoms that bloomed out at the end of April and have been falling like pink snow ever since. It's absolutely beautiful to be standing in.

And yes, the paths to the parks have been wearing holes in my loafers the past couple of weeks.   Most days we are on a morning and afternoon routine split between the two parks we frequent. I take Carolina just before pick up and then back again once we have Elisa. Or if Nacho is home, he'll collect her and we'll all meet up for lunch at Lou Lodati.  The girls love each park for different reasons, and it's clear that mixing it up makes everyone happier.  Elisa finds people to play with wherever she goes, and on the rare occasion when it's just her and Carolina, she manages to make that fun as well. Yesterday, they played and chased one another for a good 30 minutes and I was delighted to see the true friendship they're building. It has nothing to do with me and I love that even more. 

Afternoons are almost exclusively reserved for jaunts over to Sunnyside Gardens Park after the girls wake from naps. We're in the middle of transitioning Elisa out of her steady nap habit (reserving it for days she really needs to be up later or is recovering from something), and it's still a bit difficult for us to be out of the house before 4 p.m. But we manage to make the most of that late afternoon sunshine and I rely on this as my one sure social opportunity of the day. Watching two kids at the public park is a bit distracting since I'm usually chasing Carolina away from the swings.  But at SGP, I can usually find a few minutes to sit and relax, sometimes with adult beverage. Now how can you beat that on a warm day?  And there's always someone to share with which makes it even better.  I brought four cans of beer the other day with some lime slices and two minutes into the park, we were enjoying some refreshments and catching up on the latest Kindergarten talk. Somehow it made it all more palatable.  

The walk home is always a bit of a drag, but leaving the park with friends makes it somehow easier.  We meander through the Gardens and stop off at different house saying goodbye. Usually Elisa wants a playdate right there on the spot--or in the case of Leonardo's house--a jam session with their made up band.  It's sometimes difficult to refuse.  And more and more, Carolina is part of these interactions and Elisa welcomes it....most of the time. I tried explaining to her the other night that when Carolina plays with her friends it's a good thing because it means they can all get along together. And little by little, her friends have also shown that they welcome this little sister into the fold. So as May winds on and the days get warmer and longer, we'll be sticking to this formula (park + nap + park = happy) for the forseeable future. Except tomorrow when it rains. Boo.

More firsts

Meet Dawn and Jamie Sweetman and their adorable family. Riley is part of the summer of 2008 tidal wave that engulfed our neighborhood, and dear sister Lucy was born last May just after they relocated to Virginia. And now they're back in Sunnyside. Yes, it didn't take long for them to miss us all and come running home. And that's what this neighborhood with our local park and playgroup feels like. Home with friends who act like family.  So Friday night we celebrated her first birthday with our first Friday night BBQ of the summer season. And I have to say, it all came together with the same ease and fun that I've come to expect from this crowd...

As we closed down the park around 8 p.m., the kids were all revved up from their evening of play and sugar. The birthday girl was serenaded by a troop of her big brother's friends--all eager for a first grab at a cupcake.  And little Lulu didn't seem to mind. She was patient and sweet with her frosting covered fingers. It reminded me that only a year ago, I was watching Jasper and Kira and Carolina celebrate their firsts. And now this summer we get ready for the Twos. How is that even possible? It was a nice walk home and Nacho and I both reflected on how much we love this neighborhood and its assortment of families. It is definitely a huge part of the appeal of staying in the city and these 10 blocks of Sunnyside, even when we know life could be easier. Conveniences can't make up for having these friends and the kind of impromptu evenings where we are all entertained equally. Elisa found her dancing friends, Carolina her rock raking pals, Nacho his dapper dads, and me, well, I bounced around the picnic grove happily chatting and snapping pics. We were all contented.  Knowing we have a full summer ahead of BBQs and hanging out together makes me ready for the heat wave that's sure to follow. With plenty of nights like this, we will get through the summer just fine.