Who's that girl?

I feel like the blog has become so much more of a recorder of events and not necessarily the journal for my children that I intended 5+ years ago. I suppose it's just good that I'm still maintaining it at all. But there are times when I wish I was recording more of what it feels like to parent. What the girls are really like from this bird's eye view. Staying home with them, I really see it all, and I have to say I feel like I know them both so well. I suppose in another 10 years, I might not be able to say that. But right now, I'm deep in the trenches and there's so much reward for being able to make this my job day in and day out.  I get to enjoy the little moments like Carolina tearing through the apartment after we say goodbye to Elisa in the morning. It's been such a welcome change to deal with her one-on-one this fall, especially as the toddler tantrums and stubbornness have taken hold. There are days the whining and screeching don't stop for hours. It's like every 5 minutes, there's a new emergency and she must. have. her. way.  But when Carolina isn't playing second fiddle to big sister, she can really shine and it's easier to defuse the situations that inevitably arise when she wants what she can't have. A good tickle or playful romp on the bed will send her into the kind of gigglefest that makes the room brighter. "Again! Do it again!" she shouts. And she can get pretty emphatic. Carolina might be a more gentle soul, but she's no shrinking violet either. Being able to see her as her own little person and not just Elisa's sister, has been the best thing about our time together this fall. She's growing so fast and talking so much more these days. But still, she will forever be my little girl. And I'm hanging on to these lazy days at home together for the not-too-distant future when she's running after the school bus too. Oh, how fast it goes.

Tree trimmed

There are some traditions I stick with pretty easily and so far, getting a live Christmas tree for our apartment living is one of those holiday must haves. There's just no way around it, even if Nacho isn't onboard. I am, and that's all that matters. So after the Santa shoot, I found myself alone with the car and in plenty of time to swing over to Home Depot and wrangle the tree back by myself. Normally, I would dread this kind of thing, but I guess I was feeling all Christmasy from the kids loving their time with Santa plus it had just started snowing, so I felt merrily high and up for the trek. Even having to walk the length of the parking lot to find an empty shopping cart didn't deter me. The line of people waiting to get their trees tied up and paid for should have, but I parked my cart with a tree stand in it and went about selecting the perfect pine. 

The selection that Sunday afternoon left a lot to be desired. I tried finding anything but a balsam fir but there wasn't much choice. Then finally I spotted a nice looking 7-8 ft. fraser fir and my heart jumped. This was it. I stood it up and the trunk looked straight. Grabbing hold of it from the middle, I managed to pull it out and start the slow slump back to where my cart was. Only by the time I pushed and pleaded with people to move so I could pass, I returned to my little corner and found the cart had been taken. A woman was pushing an empty cart away and I politely but forcefully asked if that was my cart. "No!" she said and it seemed there was no chance for debate. Okay, I threw it up to the universe. "DID ANYONE TAKE MY CART THAT WAS PARKED HERE??" 

And just like that, a young boy of about 7-8 years said, "Oh, we did. Dad, I think that was her cart. Yeah, sorry..." And then he began to remove the items they had placed in it while his dad held firm to the tree and stared icily through me. "Well, I had a cart too and someone took mine. Maybe YOU took it?" he said. "What?? No, I went to get my cart in the parking lot." I waited for this to sink in but he didn't look like he was budging. The kid was the one who was telling him to give the cart back and much to my amazement after an awkward pause, he took the tree out and swung the empty cart my way. "THANKS. At least your kid knows how to do the right thing," I said and slung my tree in it before it could get away a second time. Merry fucking Christmas, asshole. Yeah, that's the holidays in NYC.

And that is how we came to have this beautiful, wonderful-smelling Christmas tree.  We let the girls throw some ornaments on it after I had carefully placed the lights and garland just so.  I'm still a little too like my mother about the tree. I don't like people messing it up before I've had a chance to lay the groundwork, so I guess there's some time for me to chill about that, but really, kids are the worst at doing this stuff right. Maybe once they're older I'll be better. Hopefully. But for now, they were mostly just interested in playing with the delicate glass balls and trying to make me crazy with how they couldn't really figure out the hanging part. Elisa could do the soft ornaments just fine, but I really hated to leave her with anything fragile and expect it to survive. Nacho did his only ornament (the Brooklyn Beer globe) and then he hoisted Elisa to the top to place our new dollar store star up above it all. Switching to color lights was a real hit this year, since I've stuck with white lights in the past. It's funny how much more I like it--maybe because it looks more like the Christmas trees of my own childhood. Whatever the reason, having a tree up makes it feel like this is the real deal. Santa is on his way...

Big Apple Time Again

It's such a simple thing tradition. Yet doing the same thing at the same time of year can be so fantastically fun that you wish you didn't have to wait all year to do it again. That's how I feel about going to the Big Apple Circus. This was our third year going with our playgroup gang to the annual event at Lincoln Center and it was just as exciting for Elisa too, as well as being a new thrill for Carolina. I was slightly worried about how she'd do sitting on our laps, but as luck would have it, the group moved around and Sophia ended up sitting on her mom's lap, so we snagged Carolina her own seat after all. The fact that she mostly wanted to turn around and watch Riley while the circus danced and whirled behind her was pretty amusing. Kids are so weird. But thankfully, our group didn't mind another wandering, fidgety kid so we let her be and the evening played out beautifully. 

The fact that Elisa's school had a half day yesterday made everything work out so well. We got her to nap alongside Carolina and rolled out of the neighborhood around 5pm leaving just enough time to get to the venue and grab our seats without rushing. Since it was a benefit for the City Meals on Wheels program that night, we were even blessed with free concessions. Yes, FREE. As in, I got three cotton candies, two hot dogs, two sodas, two juice boxes, two popcorns and paid $0 when I would have normally spent $40 easy. It more than made up for our slightly higher priced tickets (compared to last year's bargain $25 ones) which were still a great value because Monica wrangled them into another group discount. And in the end, they upgraded our seats and even feature our "Sunny Playgroup" in the program! Woo hoo! It was a really easy, fun night and the kids did great even trudging home on two trains and sticking together without any problems. It was the kind of night you hope to have more of as a parent living here. I really am starting to see the future with two kids who don't melt down at every turn (just some of the time, let's be honest), and it looks like fun. The show was probably not as riveting as last year's ode to circuses, but it was highly entertaining nonetheless. The tightrope walkers and acrobats were probably my favorites, but Elisa liked it all. Nacho made his return to the venue after missing last year's to stay home with Carolina and it was nice to be all together after his overnight trip in the middle of the week. Who knows how many more years of going together as a group we'll have. But I'm happy to have made it again with this group. Thanks for the great night!

Tap-a tap-a tap-a

This week was a busy one with not only the Winter Concert on Tuesday night, but also the parent observation week at Elisa's tap class at Sunnyside Ballet Studio.  Since these things were pretty much back-to-back right after school and lasted until nearly 8pm, I wasn't optimistic about how the night would turn out. But at least it all started off on a good note...At first Elisa was a little nervous about having parents in the class with her telling me she didn't want to go to dance that night. But when I explained that it was just so we could go and enjoy the music and see how great they were all doing she perked up. Once the instructor played the thumpin' beat, Elisa sure changed her tune. I won't say she was the most accurate of dancers, but what she lacks in technique, she definitely makes up for in spunk and rhythm. The kid has the music in her and it's wonderful to watch. 

Seeing their drills and time steps, shuffles and flaps brought back lots of memories from my own first dance class. I think tap is a great way to begin to get the basics of learning routines and practicing steps. Elisa has some things to work on, but since she's the youngest in her class, I think there's plenty of time to catch up. She was happy by the end of the routine and she was bowing like a pro. I think we'll give this at least a year to see how she likes it and hopefully it will become something she looks forward to as much as I did. Reliving my childhood isn't the point here, even though it sounds a little like that, but I really only hope Elisa finds her groove doing something she loves.  For me sports were never the draw, it was all dance all the time. Elisa might be a kid that likes to do everything...or nothing. Time will tell. But starting small and letting her find her own way is my biggest challenge. I guess we'll both see where this leads. For now, she enjoys the music and the dancing enough to keep at it. The proof is in the video!

Winter Concert

Words can't really describe how beautiful the Winter Concert at Elisa's school was. Photos might do it some justice, but there's just not enough life coming through. The kids were all wiggly excitedness and the songs were perfect little harmonies from such an assortment of personalities. Elisa rocked the back row and made sure to smile and wave and blow me air kisses at the end of the songs. Any doubts I had about her getting shy or nervous were obliterated after the opening bars. She's a total ham and it shows. But still, I think she just loves performing and singing especially makes her happy. 

Seeing all the kids come to life in this beautiful setting was such a treat. The stage and backdrop were decked out in the most wintery, festive way and I really applaud all the parents and staff for getting this pulled together. Of course, I'd be remiss if I didn't say my only critique of the night was the fact that it ended so late. Leaving there at 8:10pm and trying to drag two kids home on my own with the bake sale and book fair calling their name was chaotic and annoying. But we managed. If the concert could only be moved up a little starting before 6pm, I think it would have been flawless. Maybe next time. 

But that aside, the evening was a rare peek into the music program at the school and I have to say they have a perfect teacher in Mr. Noel.  He and the others played great accompanying beats and the kids sang like angels. I have so many great photos of the night I was able to share with the parents' group. It makes my heart happy to do so. And I have a few small snippets of Elisa wiggling and singing to show Nacho who wasn't there. Who knows, maybe this is the beginning of Elisa's stage career? Katy Perry, you have been warned.  But even if it's not, it's just fun to see how much she loves it. I love watching her which means we're finally a good team.