Fussy Gus

It was bound to happen. Here we are at 10 months visiting family and Carolina decides to be a "fussy gus" as I like to say. She only wants to stand and "walk" with you pulling her fingers up and helping her. She only wants to feed herself and make the most mess possible. And she only wants her momma most of the time.  She can be distracted into playing or forgetting I'm around. But when I walk back into the room or if I get up to leave, the real fussing begins. Now granted this is Carolina we're talking about, so the fussing isn't anything terrible. But she is finding new octaves and perfecting that screechy, high pitched whine.  It's enough to make you think she's a momma's girl or something. 

But I do seem to recall Elisa acting the same way just about the time she was 11-12 months old. We were vacationing in Spain on her first birthday and I can still remember how much she whined and put up her arms for me as if to say, please don't leave my side. It was a new phase and she wanted only to be with me or on me and in constant motion.  I hadn't really seen her act clingy before and I was slightly embarrassed by all her fussing.  If I just disappeared though, she was fine and the family ended up playing more with her on the short overnight trips I took away because she didn't remember to whine for me.  So now at least I know what this is all about and can remember that pretty soon it passes. But for now, it's one more stage in the constantly updating development calendar and true to form, Carolina is right on track.  She's my baby girl who is becoming more and more of a toddler every day. And if I had to put money on it, I'd say she'll be walking by her birthday in another month and a half. At least, I'm hoping she will so I can stop stooping over. That's making me whine too. 

West Coast Livin'

Yesterday we flew out to California for the beginning of a two week vacation visiting my sister and her family in Twentynine Palms.  The closest direct flight was into LAX which is almost 3 hours from their home so we aimed for the noon flight out of JFK and amazingly made it on.  This after the check-in agent grimaced as she told us it was oversold by 1 seat and we were number 34 on the standby list. Not good odds.  But then we made it with four seats of our own, no less.  It just goes to show you that with standby you always have to wait and see. I know it sounds crazy, but all the adrenaline to get to the airport with two kids and too many bags when you are traveling this way gets you through the nerves, and most of the time it's worth it.  Elisa was acting like a traveling pro for the first few hours and except for slicing into Carolina's pinky as I lowered the suitcase handle, things were off to a good start.  [Bleeding, screaming babies are so much more fun to travel with!]  

So off we flew and for the most part, the flight was tolerable.  We at least got sandwiches and ice cream and there was another 4 year old seated nearby who entertained Elisa for a good couple of hours. However, we were crammed into the very last row on the plane which means the seats didn't recline so the car seat was upright at a bad angle for Carolina to rest, and the lady in front of her was pushed back almost into her lap.  It didn't help matters that she was also extremely constipated and kept throwing up on herself each time she tried to poop.  So my plan to feed her all the way to California was steadily backfiring on me.  She ate and drank and then upchucked--so many times I stopped counting and I had no more clean clothes for her.  Oh well.  Somehow I tried to stay zen about it all--it would be over soon.  Nothing is permanent.  And then after a terrifically crazy outburst from Elisa which would have earned us a spot back in the terminal had it happened earlier, it was time to land.  Ta-da! Welcome to LA!  Stacey was there right on schedule and we loaded into her car while Nacho turned around and headed back to NYC on the next flight. Yeah, he's nuts. But having his help on the way out was critical.  Any delusion I had that I could have done this myself was out the window.  Having two of them means needing two of us--at least for now.  Unfortunately, Nacho has to work the next few days and so he won't be joining us again until Sunday, June 10th.

On the way to Stacey's house, we stopped at In-N-Out Burger just so I could decide if the first time there on our last trip was a fluke. I didn't really love my burger that time so I was hoping to see if this one, at a location outside of LA might prove better.  But it did not. So disappointing, but hey, at least Carolina used the opportunity to unload her way overdue poop.  And again the chain gets zero points for not having a changing table in the women's restroom.  Even my chocolate shake was just so-so which pretty much seals the deal on never having to return.  The rest of the drive was uneventful and Carolina was a much happier baby.  We made it in and threw both girls in bed just after enough play time to satisfy their curiosity.  Stacey's home is warm and inviting and thankfully spacious, which makes settling in easy.  And now my goal over the next couple of days is just to have some low key fun and get the girls on Cali time.  Carolina cried out multiple times between 1 a.m. and 2:30 a.m. last night after that long day, and I had to give her a bottle to calm her back down.  But after that she stayed down til 7 a.m.!  I woke up elated and restfully groggy. Would it be too much to expect the same tomorrow?  Don't worry I know the answer.

Welcome June!

Today we flip the calendar over to June. The first real month of summer, when the days are still growing longer and the park sprinklers are switched on almost every day.  The ice cream man begins to taunt us with greater frequency and Elisa begs to go to the park from the minute she wakes up.  It usually starts the night before with something like, "Hey mom, I have a great idea. Why don't when I wake up we go to the park?"  Imagine sleeping every night with only that thought floating in your head. Ahh, what sweet bliss. And yes, we do go to our local Sunnyside Gardens Park just about every day in the summer. Sometimes twice a day.  It's just that good.  And lately I'm even more acutely aware of how good we have it because the park is private (one of only two in NYC) and the membership has been at capacity for over a year now.  When we joined three years ago, it was wide open and the original requirement to live "in-zone" (meaning in Sunnyside Gardens) was lifted because space was available. But not so this year when there is a wait list to join and the first priority is given to applicants who live in the designated zoned areas.  I get that the park was founded a long time ago and it was set aside for the homes in the Gardens and adjoining properties (Phipps Hall).  But still it kind of saddens me.  If these rules had been in effect when we wanted to join, we wouldn't have made the cut.  We would have missed out on so much.  It makes me think of all the new families with small kids who live in our neighborhood who won't have the same experience of playing at the park--at least not for awhile.  I realize we have been fortunate in so many aspects of our family life in this city, but especially true is that we have found a real community in Sunnyside with our kids and that all revolves around the park.  So maybe I'm just squeezing every bit of value out of our membership because I truly appreciate what we have within those gates.  It's our communal backyard and we plan to spend a lot of time there this summer. Bring on the sprinklers and the wading pool, new equipment in the Lowers. And most of all, bring on the barbecues with friends and the long summer evenings chatting away while the kids run free. This is summer. This is living. 

Summer starts

This week feels like summer is here. The heat, the friends visiting, us getting ready for vacation.  And the sprinklers are starting to come on at the park and that means more fun in the sun for Elisa. She loves the water and can't wait for the wading pool to open (hopefully soon!). Carolina, on the other hand, doesn't get as much down time to play between meals in the stroller and hanging out waiting for us to leave. But I'm trying to change that. Today we spent a good hour roaming around the park and I let her crawl around the stage and then stand up on the small equipment in the sand box. And she loved it. Just yesterday she pulled up on the kitchen gate for the first time and her smile showed me how proud she was. Won't be long before she's letting go and taking her first steps. But for now, just seeing her start to really move around and interact at the park is fun. Baby steps. Baby steps...

Reason for celebration

Shortly after the news came that Kyle, one of our youngest playgroup kids, had been seriously injured in an accident, there was lots of discussion about what we could do to help.  The family was shuttling back and forth to the hospital so meals would have to wait, and relatives had flown in to help take care of the older boy Teo so we couldn't offer babysitting.  When I heard that Teo's birthday would be coming up just a week after the accident and the family wasn't sure they could go ahead with the planned birthday party at the park, it seemed like the perfect opportunity for us to step in and do something. And boy, did we. This playgroup has been the best thing that's happened to me as a mom, and it felt like we were all seeing it take on a new role. It was a go-to organizing machine with offers to bring everything we needed to the party and then some. We also had amazing help from family friend Ma Yan and neighbors Lindsey and Guy.  The biggest obstacle to our planning the birthday festivities was the will-it-or-won't-it-rain weather. But in the end, it didn't.  And the park was the perfect spot to enjoy an early summer evening among friends.

There was pizza and cupcakes, watermelon and cake.  There were sack races and parachute games.  There were puppets and a clown, and a piñata bursting with candy.  The kids ate and ran like they always do at these things. And us parents huddled around the tables enjoying the setting sun with good company.  I'm not sure Teo will remember this birthday party when he's older. And I really hope by next May this family has many more reasons to celebrate with both their boys in the park. But in the meantime, it's a wonderful feeling to know there are so many helping hands and warm hearts that are there waiting to come together and help. Sometimes in this city, you can feel awfully alone without family nearby, but not here. Not in Sunnyside. It's times like this you realize that "family" isn't just the kind you grew up with. If you're lucky, you get to make your own and sometimes friends are the best family you can have.