Young Leo

So I came across a link to children's horoscopes this morning as I was logging into my email and I couldn't resist. Here's what it said about Elisa's birth date:

"Leo children are rays of light - playful, willing to be the center of attention, always ready to put on a show. This child is highly entertaining and able to assess the presence of an audience with surprising sophistication. In infants you may notice his showmanship just by their alert and pleasant nature, like stars ready to go onstage. There is warmth and charm about little Leos. As the baby grows into a toddler, there will be a marked agility with the body, a natural athleticism, good balance, and physical features such as a wide brow or a big head of hair. Leo children are natural stars and may need a little help when it comes to fitting in with their peer group. They are naturally popular, but may have issues when it's not their turn with a toy or game, or simply not their turn to shine. Rebuffs or accidental slights might be taken as deep insults. Imagine a cat getting water poured on its fur! At these junctures, help your little Leo understand that they are not the target of ridicule, even though they feel terribly humiliated because it means so much to them to be loved, adored, even worshipped! Remember, many actors, rock stars, and politicians are Leos, so you have a big personality on your hands! Leo is a fire sign and thus warm, affectionate and sexually uninhibited. Encourage your child's free expression with the body, maybe introducing dance lessons when he or she is ready. Some kind of physical exercise that channels all that fiery exuberance is recommended, lest the energy be repressed or express itself in unproductive ways. Be the parent who gently reminds your son or daughter about boundaries and limits, their own and other people's, so that you are a trusted source of support, not a critical judge."

Of course, I know this description is probably true for lots of kids, but I swear she fits the performing part to a T. And Nacho has been saying that she'll probably be a comedian with the way she loves to perform and make us laugh for months now. I think a star is born!

Edited to add: Here is the link from the MSN website: http://astrocenter.astrology.msn.com/msn/gochildprofile.aspx

Aunt 'Tacey

Elisa loves a visitor and this week Aunt Stacey has been staying with us giving Elisa plenty of audience. Although we haven't been taking her into Manhattan with us, Elisa has enjoyed a little extra time with daddy while us girls have had our night (and day) out. Luckily Aunt Stacey likes taking photos as much as we do and she has a great camera so there have been lots of opportunities for capturing the moment. Here are some of my favorites so far...

Happy Mother's Day to all!

It's 6:15pm and Elisa decided to have a third nap today, so I'm taking advantage of it by catching up on my blogging and reflecting on all that this day means. I thought since Nacho would be traveling this weekend I should attempt to make plans which would keep me from wallowing in my first mother's day alone. As always, my good friend Dan Riley came through and even brought me flowers for our pancake breakfast at home. Since convincing Dan to move to Sunnyside last year, I've reaped many benefits from his friendship and proximity. He's the kind of guy you like to know is around at the drop of a hat.

Here he is teaching Elisa some great recipes from the Amy Sedaris cookbook. Hilarious stuff if you haven't seen that before. We visited the park at Greenpoint and 47th Ave for a few minutes to let Elisa get her swing on, before hitting the Paraguayan bakery for some delicious empanadas.
I should note that in his absence, Nacho did ensure I wouldn't go empty-handed this mother's day. He gave me a very nice (and unexpected) gift certificate to a day spa in Manhattan that came highly recommended from my friend Protima. As Nacho said, when you want luxury, you can trust Protima will steer you right. So, thanks to his initiative and Protima's good taste, I'll have a treat to enjoy in the next few weeks.  Most of all I think I enjoyed this first mother's day because I really feel like I'm beginning to get the balance back in my life that was hard to come by in the first 6 months. Elisa has mastered sleeping and naps and is a very playful and enjoyable baby to be around. And I'm realizing that if you approach the day with new eyes, the same routines and actions can be fun, or at least offer the potential for small moments that you will never forget.
I see more and more of my own reflection in Elisa lately and maybe that's why it's such a joy to see her smile back or clap her hands or just babble softly to herself. It's like watching all that I must have gone through too as a baby and wondering what on earth she'll be like in another year, or three or five. It's such a mystery and yet it propels you forward in time like nothing else. I can't wait to meet her again and again every day.
And of course, I'm also reflecting on this day what it means to be a mother and how the women in my life have informed my own sense of motherhood. I'm extremely grateful to all of them for the wisdom shared and the little encouragements that have meant the world to me. So for all of us on this day, I hope it is filled with lots of hugs and laughter.

Just beachy

We're flying back home today but here are some pics from our first beach adventure of 2009!

Sunny days are here again

As some of you already know, Elisa is getting her first tooth right now. It's just broken through on the bottom and I can see the imprint of the one next to it about to do the same. It's such a cool "first" that I had to try to get a photo of it. She is obsessively passing her tongue over it and loves turning her spoon around to bite on the metal end. Here we are today in the park trying to enjoy this first almost summer-like Saturday. 

Virtual moms

I've never been one to shy away from a social outing so when someone mentioned to me that there was a mom's group in my neighborhood I had to know more. Of course, at the time I was only a few months pregnant and was in no hurry to meet the nitty gritty of real parenting. So I did my research and sent an email to the group moderator of the online moms forum and bided my time. Within a week or so, I received my welcome to the group known as Sunnymoms. The welcome turned out to be an Inbox so full of daily email exchanges--everything from questions about feedings, to nanny advice, to apartments for rent--that I almost thought about setting up a new account just to handle the volume. For those last blissfully ignorant months, it was nice to kind of spy on the "real" moms and read their concerned queries about which pediatricians supported extended breastfeeding or where to get a carseat installed properly in the neighborhood. And then Elisa was born. And suddenly this virtual world of mom-dom wasn't just light reading and then "delete" for me anymore. I was checking in around the clock to see who was posting about sleepless nights, or who knew the best ways to swaddle a baby, or why for the love of God hasn't someone cured the world of colic?? I didn't post much at first, but still it was nice to know that out there in the middle of the night, in an apartment maybe on the same block, there was someone--a mom just like I was--going through all the same things and making sense of it one day at a time.

Though there were some moms already meeting regularly at the local parks and coffee shops, it wasn't long before a "new" moms group emerged. In the haze of Elisa's first 3 months, I read longingly of their Thursday morning get togethers, always hoping that next week I could make it. But week after week, I was with family or had no more than 30 min. sleep all night or felt less than human in my pajamas for the third day in a row and I couldn't make it. By early December, I was fortified with a couple of good, restful weeks behind me and I went to the first meeting for the new moms group that had just been born. It was an oasis of normalcy. Women sitting around with their babies, some sleeping, some nursing, but all acting like babies, and I realized that I was in good company.

Now flash forward 4 months and Elisa is growing so fast I can barely recognize her from the squishy-faced little screamer I'd adored at first sight. And the weekly meetups are still happening--mostly without me--but I've been able to swing work around a few more times to make it. And each time I do, I realize that I need this in my life. I have so many wonderful friends, but most don't live here and the ones that do don't have kids. It's hard to explain but there is a naturalness and a lack of pretense with these virtual moms that I find so refreshing. Being able to whine or bitch or laugh at the things we are all going through and to hear yourself in their answers is such powerful reinforcement. Part of our setting up a regular schedule with our nanny is so I can have a more reliable week-to-week presence in the office. And secretly, part of it is so I can make my once a week moms meetups in the nabe. It's a shame that I haven't been more, but my goal is to have Elisa asking me in a year if we can go see her friends on Thursday. And I hope the answer is "yes."

p.s. photos are courtesy of fellow Sunnymom Kristin Burns

http://www.kristinburnsphoto.com/

Family Portrait

Since we have been struggling with the question of whether or not to upgrade to a 2 bedroom apartment, I thought it would be wise to enjoy the last few months of our cheap rent and buy the big toy Nacho's been wanting: a macbook (I think that's "mactalk" for laptop). Of course, like all kids, he's been playing with it and discovering new tricks.  The photos above are from the photobooth option he showed me the other morning as I was heading out the door to work (which may explain why I am the only one who looks somewhat awake here).

As I write this I must also confess that we are still very perplexed about the whole concept of real estate in New York City. The desire for more space and a real bedroom for our daughter is a strong counterpoint to the twinge of prudent greed about our insanely affordable, spacious 1 bedroom.  In some alternate universe I hear myself say that I live in a 1 bedroom apartment with my husband and child and wonder why I think that's normal.  I was born into a 3 bedroom house in a nice, middle-class suburb of Kansas City, MO with a large yard, swing set and more room to explore than a kid could possibly appreciate. It was a wonderful way to grow up.   I have great memories of riding my bike around unfettered or playing hide and go seek late into the summer night or walking our dogs all around the neighborhood with other friends when I could barely tie my own shoes.  Now I scoff at the 'burbs as those boring places where other people live.  

I have come to value the things this city can offer with its diversity, its beautiful parks, great museums and the promise of something new on every block.   But while I know how to live here as an independent, adult woman, I'm still coming to terms with living here as a mother.  And more than ever, the question of where to live in New York--which neighborhood, what school district, which subway stop--feels like the eternal, unanswerable question. When we moved here 4 years ago from Philadelphia we were taking a big jump into the unknown, but still I knew we could handle anything that happened. Nacho and I have always been a good team that way.  How we lucked into this apartment, this wonderful neighborhood, I'll never fully understand. It was, and is, a great discovery--a home. And this is why it's so difficult to contemplate a move anywhere else in the city. What I want most of all is to be able to stay put and build on the feeling that makes Sunnyside so special--it is a true community hidden away in a big city. Even with my big backyard, I never got that as a kid. If Elisa can forgive me for another year, she might just realize someday that having her own room wasn't so important anyway.

Daddy's girl

If there was ever any doubt about it, we can safely say now that Elisa is most definitely a daddy's girl. Here she is with Nacho loving every minute of her ticklefest and managing to catch a bit of the Colbert Report too.

Spring swings in

Thankfully, Nacho has had a great schedule this month and we've been trading off childcare duties with ease. As we've observed for some time now, it's amazing how easy she can be when you are dealing with her one-on-one.  Though she seems to be a very social little girl, I think the extra stimulation of mommy and daddy around at the same time, or extra house guests seems to hype her up a bit.  But the days when she is happy to play in her crib for a bit between feedings or takes 2 hour long naps and sings herself to sleep are the best.

Of course, Elisa continues to impress us with her many expressions and shrieks of joy.  She does some pretty funny dancing as well when she stands on your lap and moves her hips and shoulders. We're nearing the 8 month mark next week and it's cool to feel little tooth buds working their way to the surface on her bottom gums. No actual teeth yet, but we're close...so close! She's also been moving her bedtime up a little bit and now goes down most nights between 8:30 and 9:30pm. This is a welcome change since even a month ago, we had many nights where she was eating her last bottle at those times. Somehow just regaining a few hours in the evening to eat dinner, watch tv, or clean up without her is like gold. It feels like I've done something right.

We haven't had too many warm spring days yet, though there have been plenty with sunshine. Here are a few pics Nacho snapped at the park behind our apartment. Enjoy and more soon!

Soft voices

Elisa is becoming quite the talker these days...or at least a very good babbler. She really loves watching us talk and interact and will sometimes interject a thing or two if we stop paying enough attention to her. In the mornings when I pick her up from her crib, she usually has some nice, soft things to tell me. Like she's been waiting there thinking of things that I would want to hear. It's so sweet. Here's a sample.