The week in review

This week kicked my ass. First there was Monday's horrible turn of events at the Boston Marathon followed by the Senate overwhelming rejecting some much need gun reform legislation. Add in one massively destructive explosion at a fertilizer plant in Texas and my truly shitastic luck cracking the screen on our one week old iMac, and I was ready to call an end to the thing by Wednesday.  And yes, I know how absurd it is to put those  scenarios in the same sentence as my pitiful computer problems. But whatever. They all made me cry. There was a lot of emotion this week--enough that I was happy to bring a pitcher of sangria to the park on Friday afternoon and kill it with some good friends.  Sometimes in the midst of anxiety and sadness, you just need one good thing to happen. And if I push myself, I can honestly say there were a couple of those too.  Like seeing a friend from high school who was great to catch up with or hanging out at brunch with my mama friends today. And how about finding out that Elisa made the cut at the Kindergarten lottery for a great charter school? That's better than a kick in the head, right? But I'm still done with this week. Good night, Saturday. Hope Sunday is more my speed.

Sisters

As much as they squabble with each other, they also love each other to bits. Sometimes it's hard to remember what it was like before Carolina--before there was this shadow following Elisa around imitating everything she does. I forget how it felt to just have one child.  How could I have been so busy with just one? Now I see what it takes to keep two spinning parts in motion and some days they really run me ragged. But then there are these little moments, playing in bed or sharing a laugh or ice creams and I am so smitten with them as a pair. They are each other's best friend. Even if they don't know it yet.

Saturday in the city

On Friday I went into Manhattan for a haircut and as I left the salon and wandered through SoHo, I had one of those strange epiphanies.  I really missed the city.  I felt like we were friends who hadn't seen each other in a long time and I wanted to sit and have coffee and catch up.  Everywhere I turned there were new stores and eateries and so many little corners I wanted to explore. And yes, I know I'm still living in New York City, but I guess the problem is that it doesn't feel like it at times.  With two kids and a comfortable existence in our little oasis of Sunnyside, Queens, I just don't have the same opportunities to wander aimlessly throughout the city. Nacho and I aren't taking walks post-work to discover new restaurants and cozy little cafes. We have fallen into our routines of eating out in the neighborhood (if at all) and hitting the local playgrounds when we want to socialize. 

And most of the time that's enough. But when it's not, I find I have an ache--an almost physical yearning--to spend more time walking around the city finding new favorite places and sights. It's something I can't explain better than that, and it's probably the reason that I can't imagine moving anywhere else. After you live here, what else can keep such a hold on you? It may not be for everyone, but I feel like in the 8 years I've been here, I've only scratched the surface of what the city has to offer. And on days like Friday, I realize that I'm getting slightly closer to being able to enjoy more time in the city. The girls are growing up and getting easier to deal with on these kind of outings. It's really more about my will to do it--the stamina will follow. And at times, I admit I get overwhelmed by the enormity of the city. There's so much to choose from it's hard to pick a place to visit without thinking there must be something better around the corner. The dilemma is oddly paralyzing.  But after my day alone, I wanted to do something fun with the family.  So yesterday, the weather looked decent and Nacho was off so we talked about doing something in the city. There was a playground on the west side a few moms mentioned recently and it looked promising. Tom Otterness, the sculptor, designed its bronze slides much like the little figurines that grace the subway platform on 14th street, my old stomping grounds. It was a good starting point for our walk through Hell's Kitchen...

Both girls loved the slides and we spent a good 30 minutes letting them run wild. The playground is situated on kind of a weird block at the far end of 42nd Street. So when Nacho suggested grabbing lunch nearby at Daisy May's BBQ, I was sold. It would be an easy walk and sharing meats and sides would work out fine. So far, this day in the city with two kids was working out pretty well. Yes, there was some mild fussing at the restaurant and lots of interrupted bites as I dealt with their demands throughout lunch.  Carolina is just at that terrible age for sitting still anywhere so she really hates high chairs. And Elisa can be counted on to eat for a little while. But she too gets antsy and wants to dance or switch chairs. Fortunately, we were done fast and back out on the street heading north to find another distraction as we walked towards Central Park. I wasn't really clear on what we were doing next, but after a few blocks, we spotted a neighborhood park near 47th that looked inviting. The sun struggled to come out until about 1pm, so we were finally out and enjoying some warmth. One crazy (possibly drunken) mother in the park later and we were looking for a reason to bolt. I got a recommendation for a good natural ice cream place, Je & Jo, a block away and that was our final stop on this day of exploring.  Coffee with cookie dough for the girls and an affogato for Nacho and me. A little something for everyone which is just how I like my city days. My confidence and energy restored, I look forward to more of this in the coming months.

Swing time

This was taken today at Lou Lodati playground right after I picked Elisa up from school. She ran into her friend Mimi who made the swings a whole lot more fun. Somehow just seeing their delight in something so simple made me smile. Enjoy...

Enter April

April is here. But the only bare skin we're seeing is when we shed our layers indoors.  Case in point, I haven't even pulled all the short sleeve shirts I have stored away for Carolina because it hasn't been warm enough for us to need them yet (and okay, she prefers the topless look right now). Soon though we will be without jackets on the playground...yes, hopefully soon...

But for now another week down and still this weather is just not cooperating.  We saw more of the sun, but there were still lots of chilly mornings and windy afternoons.  It just doesn't feel like we've caught a break at all this spring. No gloriously warm afternoons at the park sprinkled throughout like in years past.  So Carolina and I have been enjoying our quiet mornings hanging out at home while Elisa is in school. She takes advantage of this special time by dressing up in her sister's clothes and playing with her toys. It's kind of fun to watch partly because she knows she's getting away with something and also because it just reinforces how much she's growing up. Right before my eyes. So many times since having a another child, I've realized that the second time is just like the first in many ways--only on hyperspeed. It's like everything Carolina is doing at 20 months, Elisa was achieving by the age of 3. The language may still be lagging, but the mannerisms and interests are so much more mature. And Carolina can maneuver her way around a playground like a big kid. She really has that big kid attitude too.

And speaking of attitude, I figured this week was a good time to do a few things with my big girl since half days at school don't leave much time for just her and me. With Nacho off work a couple of days, I took advantage of the chance to leave Carolina at home napping while we slipped out.  On Wednesday we ventured over to Long Island City with Carmen and Leonardo for an abbreviated picnic lunch at Gantry Park (it was cold!), followed by an hour and a half of open playtime at LIC Kids. A few weeks ago, I bought one of those Groupon-type deals with 3 open plays for 50% off and I'd been promising Elisa we'd go. I think she was more than thrilled at pickup when I surprised her and included her BFF as well. Of course, nothing with these two is completely easy, but they managed to jump and dance and somersault their way through the playtime without too much fighting.  We decided that after indulging them all afternoon it was time to treat ourselves, so a final stop at Sweet Leaf for a coffee and pastry was the finishing touch. I'll definitely be ready to return on a rainy day later this month.

And after such a good week, it seemed only right that we get her haircut in anticipation of the warmer temps to come. For whatever reason haircuts haven't been my favorite thing to plan and execute. In fact, in 4 1/2 years, I've only taken her twice to get real haircuts and both times at Cozy Cuts, a toy store/salon that ensures you'll spend more on the toys and crap than the outrageously priced cut. But hey, they do let you pick your own video. So anyway, this time I was determined to find some place local. Somewhere without a TV as its main attraction. I started asking Elisa about cutting her hair a few weeks back after she kept making comments about wanting hair "like Carolina." What does that mean? Short? With bangs? I wasn't sure. So once we discussed the length and she told me she wanted short hair and bangs, I figured it was time to take action. I tried Florent's on 49th Street this time and was pleasantly surprised when Elisa didn't freak out. We had a bit of a wait, so we grabbed a slice of pizza and came back. And by that time the stylist was ready to wash, cut and style Elisa into a whole new look. It's kind of an angled bob with a really grown up style.  I didn't mention the bangs and I think she forgot about them until about 5 minutes after we left. I just couldn't go for that change all at once. So for now, we have her summer hair taken care of and who knows, maybe soon she'll get her face framing bangs. But if she's anything like me, as soon as she gets them she'll want to grow them out again. Oh God, I hope she's smarter than that. 

Easter Weekend

After making it back home on Friday evening, we really hit the ground running for Easter weekend. I helped organize the Easter Egg Hunt at SGP on Saturday which was a great time, and my first event of the year.  My personal goal was that no child would show up and not find an egg. After last year's disappointing hunt, anything would have been better. So we devised a plan where the eggs would be hunted and turned in for candy before being run back out to the field for hiding, thus keeping them in constant rotation. It was a little messy at first with all the eggs scooped up and the kids waiting in line to get their reward. But after about 20 minutes, things calmed down and from what I could tell, everyone seemed to be finding eggs and having fun.  The day was bright and sunny, though not terribly warm (high in the upper 50s), which made it all feel springier than the past few weeks.  Nacho brought the girls on his own since I was already there helping set up, and I have to give him kudos for following the crazy toddler around while I kept checking back in with the volunteers.  As for our two, Carolina didn't care about the eggs at all, but she was happy to be out and running free.  And after Elisa found her eggs and got her candy, she played my little helper throwing the eggs out on the field for more kids to find.  So yeah, I'll call this hunt a success! 

Afterwards, we came home for a rest and while Carolina napped, I boiled up some eggs. Yes, I was going to make this a full-fledged Easter extravaganza. And unlike last year when I felt a little conflicted about how to deliver this holiday message when so much of it seems wrapped in the Jesus-died-for-you cloak of Christianity, this time I was just happy to color some eggs and call it a day. The eggs. The bunny. It's springtime. There is just a natural urge to beautify things and celebrate all the newness of life. I might not have worked in the resurrection theme, but that's okay. We'll get there one day and maybe then my kids will surprise me with their own interpretations. So for now, we're cool with the Easter Bunny paying us a visit on Sunday morning and hunting eggs in the living room. Nacho was working all day, so I had the girls to myself to entertain.  Fortunately, they slept til a little after 7 a.m. so the day was starting off pretty good and we went to check and see what was in their baskets and hunt more eggs in the living room.  Again, Carolina was pretty clueless about finding the eggs or caring, really. And Elisa might be the only kid I've ever seen get mad about having to find eggs. She started off all giddy at the prospect, but after a couple of minutes, she was cursing ("Tartar sauce!"--thanks, SpongeBob) and actually humpfing around upset because there were still more to uncover. What a weirdo.

After our little hunt at home, it was time to bake a few cupcakes (I stole the idea for the Peep-topped confections from something I'd seen at the SGP event) and head over to Carmen's house for an Easter lunch and our third and final egg hunt. Yes, this was starting to feel like quite the Easter weekend afterall. The roasted lamb and fresh pasta lunch tasted great, and Carolina chowed down on some of the meat. That girl can put it away when she's hungry much to Carmen's delight. The wine was flowing and we had a nice roundtable of ex-Pats (I was the only American) all discussing their traditions, some politics and NYC schools. Of course, schools are never far from my thoughts this season so there was lots to talk about.  But then the kids were begging for more eggs, so off to hunt we went...

And after a few eggs were found and shared (the big kids seemed to be swapping eggs to make sure they each had a variety of colors), we came back in for dessert. I busted out the cupcakes and Gianluca offered up the wonderful Italian dessert, a pastiera, that he bought from La Guli bakery in Astoria. We drank some port and I almost forgot I hadn't taken Carolina home yet to nap. Yeah, it was that kind of day--a rare deviation from the nap schedule--that I can only chalk up to her easygoing attitude and willingness to hang with the big kids. It was really kind of amazing. After Nacho got off work and swung by to get us, I was reflecting back on the day as we quickly fed them dinner and threw their butts in bed by 7 p.m. It had been 12 hours with 2 kids and NO naps, and I hadn't lost my mind. And just for that brief minute, I had hope. Hope for a future where I am not a slave to naps and being at home for part of the day. And then just as quickly, it was dashed as both girls woke up multiple times crying through the night.  Elisa did her usual no-nap craziness moaning and shouting out before I could run in and soothe her with the comforter.  But poor Carolina was just plain sobbing and so out of sorts, she really didn't know what to do. They both finally caved around midnight and after that, it was a pretty quiet night. So yes, in the future, we will frolic and play and not worry about heading home to rest. But for now, I'm still trying to sort out our lives and make time for all that we want to do and that which we must do. And this past weekend was a bit of everything...and a lot of chocolate.